Mark Heffernan was born in Barking, London, in 1956, the Year of our Lord when the possession of heroin became fully criminalised and Bert Trautmann played in an FA Cup Final with a broken neck.

An Irish-Anglo diasporean, his major claim, thus far, was to be the main protagonist in an incident that nearly resulted in the Archbishop of Canterbury being killed in the worst ever musical to grace the West End stage.

Having survived his ‘low winter of a defeated soul,’ he now thrives as an ex primary school teacher, one of the half million former teachers in Britain.

Mark currently resides with the greatest Bette Davis lookalike in Great Britain and Northern Ireland and is the proud father of three wonderful children who have vowed never to read a word ‘the eedjit writes.’

His current heroes are Willy B. Yeats, Tommy Stoppard, Micky Frayn, Walter White, Terence McKenna and Robert Anton Wilson.